2015年6月18日雅思写作解析及语料库

　　2015年6月18日雅思写作回忆

　　In many counties, a high proportion of criminal acts are committed by teenagers. What are the causes of this phenomenon and how to solve it. 在很多国家，年轻人犯罪比例上升很快，什么造成的这个现象? 什么措施能够降低青少年犯罪率?

　　解析：teenager 13-19的年轻人

　　雅思题库：

　　There are an increasing number of juvenile delinquency. Analyze the possible causes that give rise to this phenomenon, and offer some feasible recommendations. 青少年犯罪有增加的趋势，请分析其原因，再提出解决的策略。

　　解析：juvenile delinquency n青少年犯罪；analyze v分析

　　头脑风暴：

　　青少年犯罪更多是冲动犯罪，过失犯罪，“激情”犯罪，在很多国家，青少年犯罪已经构成犯罪率的主体，其原因应该从家庭，学校，媒体，个人等角度展开，其解决策略应该对应原因。

　　青少年犯罪的原因的展开：(客观原因 + 主观原因)

　　1. 很多少年犯来自暴力家庭，单亲家庭，在这样的不良家庭背景下成长起来的孩子通常比较反驳和任性，父母对于孩子们疏远管理，他们比较容易被引入歧途。

　　2. 现在，很多成长中的年轻人承载着来自学业的巨大压力，换言之，应试教育和填鸭教学使人不堪重负，所以，很多年轻人感受不到学习的乐趣，如果他们辍学，过早地踏入社会，他们比较容易做出反社会的行为。

　　3. 不能忽视商业化的大众传播对于成长中的年轻人带来了消极的影响，换言之，很多的网络游戏或者影视节目，充斥着暴力，血腥，色情等信息，这些不良内容会毒害年轻人纯净的心灵，误导年轻人的人生观和诱发他们暴力的冲动。

　　青少年犯罪的解决策略的展开：

　　1. 父母们承担对于孩子们教育和指导的责任，即使他们已经离婚，他们也应该关注孩子们性格培养，心灵成长，鼓励他们完成学业。

　　2. 教育者应该做出同样的努力，帮助年轻人缓解学业的压力，例如，多开设一些有益成长的文体课程，激发孩子们的学习兴趣。

　　3. 对于政府而言，加强对于不良传播的审查是势在必行的。不良信息的传播应该被禁止，这样，青少年可以远离精神垃圾的毒害。

　　原创范文赏析：

　　首段：背景介绍 +　问题影响 +写作目的

　　Alarmingly, juvenile delinquency is now becoming the concern in numerous countries, which not only afflicts the families but also jeopardizes the social stability. This essay will endeavor to explore the causes of this thorny issue and represent relevant recommendations.

　　解析：not only afflicts the families but also jeopardizes the social stability v 不但给家庭带来痛苦，而且威胁到社会的稳定

　　拓展：threaten v威胁……

　　二段：青少年犯罪的原因分析的展开：

　　The potential reasons of juvenile delinquency are complicated. First, it can be mainly owed to disadvantaged family environment. Some youngsters come from the violent or divorced families. Imaginably， teenagers growing up in such environment tend to be more rebellious and willful . Hence, they are more easily to be led astray. Further, the adverse effect of the commercialized mass media is another reason. Nowadays, the Internet and the mobile phone games are besieged with information of pornography, violence and crime. These mental poisons have been seriously corrupting adolescents' innocent minds and inducing their violent impulses. So curious are some youngsters that they might blindly duplicate everything they have seen. Eventually, the rebellion and immaturity of some teenagers have contributed to their misconducts，especially when a young man comes from baneful family background and is affected by the pornographic and violent programs.

　　解析：disadvantaged family environment n 不良的家庭成长环境

　　解析：tend to be more rebellious and willful v更加容易变得反驳和任性

　　解析：the commercialized mass media n商业化的大众传播

　　解析：corrupting adolescents' innocent minds and inducing their violent impulses v 腐蚀年轻人纯净的心灵以及诱发他们的暴力冲动

　　三段：青少年犯罪解决策略的展开：

　　So severe is youth crime that we must adopt some effective measures to resolve it. First, it is imperative for the government to enact relevant legislations to strengthen the censorship of the commercialized mass media. Specifically, it is governments' obligation to eliminate the vulgar, bloody, and sadistic contents so that teenagers can stay away from the poison of spiritual rubbish. Also, efforts should be made by parents to provide their children with fine education and positive life guidance even though they might have already put an end to marriage. Lastly, it is the unshakable obligation of young people to establish right life outlook and set a clear goal. Youngsters should be encouraged to foster more healthy hobbies and continue their academic studies

　　解析：strengthen the censorship of the commercialized mass media. v加强对于商业化大众传播的审查

　　解析：eliminate the vulgar, bloody, and sadistic contents 取缔那些粗俗的，血腥的和令人恐怖的内容

　　解析：even though they might have already put an end to marriage. 即使他们已经离婚

　　解析：it is the unshakable obligation of …… 这是 …… 不可推卸的责任

　　解析：establish right life outlook and set a clear goal 树立正确的人生观;设定清晰的目标

　　点评：

　　本文个性开篇;主题明确;逻辑清晰;细节展开;衔接顺畅;论证有理;观点呼应;词汇变化;句法多元，因此符合写作的四项标准。是童鞋们可以赏析和仿写的佳作。建议背诵精彩的词汇和句法。

　　原创语料库之青少年犯罪：

　　1. juvenile crime n青少年犯罪

　　2. adolescent crime n青少年犯罪

　　3. youth crime n青少年犯罪

　　4. juvenile delinquency n青少年犯罪

　　5. young offenders n少年犯

　　6. teenage criminals n 少年犯

　　7. juvenile law-breakers n少年犯

　　8. commit a crime v犯罪

　　9. violate the law v违法

　　10. misdeeds = misconducts = criminalities n 犯罪行为

　　11. embark on the criminal road v走上犯罪的道路

　　12. turn to a life to crime v 开始犯罪的生活

　　13. conduct some anti-social offences v 做出一些反社会的行为

　　14. domestic violence and parental divorce n家庭暴力和父母离异

　　15. might become distrusting， fearful and rebellious 也许会变得疑虑的，恐惧的和反叛的

　　16. might be led astray v也许会被引入歧途

　　17. enact relevant legislations to do sth v颁布相关的法律去……

　　18. crack down the rate of youth crime v降低少年犯罪

　　19. breakdown of the marriage n 婚姻的解体

　　20. is besieged with = be flooded by = be full of v充斥着……

　　21. corrupt one's innocent mind v腐蚀一个人纯净的心灵

　　22. arouse one's violent impulse v诱发一个人暴力的冲动

　　23. is more likely to do sth = is prone is to do sth = tend to do sth v倾向于做……

　　24. blindly duplicate v盲目效仿 ……

　　25. make sb stay away from the poison of …… 使某人远离…… 的毒害